It is a scary thing to say “yes” to taking in a child you’ve never met and know very little about. When the call comes, and the only thing the voice on the other end knows is the child’s age and gender. Nothing about interests, behaviors, dislikes, personality… no pictures, no stories. Just: “Can you take him?”
It’s the worst blind date scenario.
What if he has anger issues?
What if she spews bad language?
What if I am annoyed by his personality?
What if she is mean to my kids?
What if I just can’t handle one more kid?
What if the placement goes on and on past the expected 6 months?
What if they ask me to take her siblings too?
What if he doesn’t like us?
What if it messes with our family traditions?
What if she is a super picky eater?
What if he has issues that I don’t know how to deal with?
It is a scary thing to be taken out of your home, away from your parent(s), away from your siblings, away from your toys, away from your bed, away from your neighbors and relatives and family friends. It is a scary thing to not know anything about the family who will take you in. Nothing about interests, behaviors, dislikes, personality. No pictures, no stories.
It’s an even worse blind date scenario.
The children have no choice. But we have a choice. So we choose to make the scary “yes”, for the sake of the [petrified] children.